Valle University 48, Festus High School 20
TGG takes no pleasure in nearly pegging the Festus vs Valle U. scoreboard right on the dot. Indeed, if there was ever a “water in the champagne” moment for Black & Gold boosters, it’s this very juncture. There was a clumsy, calamitous caveat next to just about everything the 0-2 Varsity Tigers did well on Friday night.
The offense made plays at a tempo rarely seen at Midmeadow Lane, but FHS blockers struggled to ward-off an all-or-nothing “Jet” defense on behalf of the visiting powerhouse. Festus blocked an XP attempt, and ran a kickoff back past the 50-yard line – yet was badly outclassed in the kicking game overall. The boys reacted a lot like a well-coached team after blowing a gasket again in the early going, but the squad’s center snap-to-QB was consistently shaky in the unexpected rain. Essien Smith is the most talented rusher on the team and could become a scintillating TD-machine in the campaigns to come. But meanwhile, head coach A.J. Ofodile’s hyped upperclass “weapons” at tailback, Landen Bradshaw and Landen Yates, have begun the 2022 season almost invisible by “Land-en” or by sea, another sour point that the skipper has to take responsibility for.
Lastly, the defense can count itself as having made progress after holding Valle U. to 3 meaningful touchdowns in 3 quarters. Those 3 quarters regretfully came after the listless boys began in true “OLE!” style, giving up 3 TDs on less than 15 snaps in a performance that recalled HC Jon Bach’s legendarily bad FHS effort from 1998.
With the Tigers’ epic St. Genevieve slate now behind us, though, it should be recalled that Festus has fielded some wonderful teams which never had a puncher’s chance against actual Show-Me Bowl representatives. Valle U. is going to win a Class 3 championship soon if the Warriors reach their potential, and the St. Genevieve Dragons may not be far behind as the supposed “B-team” in town, having threatened Missouri records with 10 TDs in the opening half against the Affton Bananas Cougars in Week 2. FHS has reached the MSHSAA semifinals just once in 30 years; 1994’s Aaron Fish-led Tigers had zero chance to score against Ofodile’s old program from Columbia Rock Bridge. Midmeadow Lane scored on a long pass just minutes into the Valle U. game on Friday, and we can all agree that if Festus reached a mid-tier Show-Me Bowl, scored on the first drive, and lost 48-20, it would be an illustration of the highest “ceiling” R-6 football has enjoyed since the 1950s. It just so happens that FHS played Valle U. in Week 2 and was hoping to avoid an 0-2 mark.
As for Valle University, the Warriors looked every bit as small, slow, and out-manned as head coach Dex R. Stacky promised in the Jefferson County Leader. The Geek has no idea who kicked over a rock and found Chase Fallert to be a #1 QB, but hey, at least Valle U. is a humble enough “Class 1 operation” to give a wee-little journeyman like Fallert the chance to try to play. Fallert rewarded his town’s generosity on Friday by adding another half-of-a-dozen scoring drives to his 40 or 50 combined TDs from the past 10 games.
Bryce Giesler fits the mold of a tiny, blue-collar tailback from a Class 1 program, and with his 200-pound frame and Division 1 college speed he too showed gratitude by running through an infinitely larger, superior Class 4 defense like it was made out of confetti on a long touchdown late in the 3rd quarter.
Then there’s Sam Drury, Valle U.’s cute little 6’1″ receiver with the helmet that looks too big for his head, playing for an undersized receiving corps that racked-up nearly 300 yards and several touchdowns at Tiger Stadium. Drury was small, slow, and overwhelmed enough to make an NFL level 1-handed back shoulder grab on a 50-yard bomb from Fallert early in the 2nd half.
Valle U. looks so poor, pitiful, and outclassed on the gridiron that there’s probably nothing to stop the Warriors from getting to 12-0 on the season. At that point, however, Valle University’s state playoff bid may run into Cardinal Ritter, another unfairly-promoted Class 3 private school that could prove to be even smaller, slower, and less well-funded than the Warriors, maybe by a 14 or 21-point margin.
Hillsboro 47, Cape Girardeau Central 7
Is Hillsboro ahead of schedule while the Seckman Jaguars and Festus Tigers lag behind in development, or are the swift Varsity Hawks just scoring another 1000 touchdowns that won’t do any good when the scoreboard resets to “0-0” at the start of the District playoffs?
TGG is in the former camp, and considers Blue & White a true District favorite already. That’s because the Hillsboro defense is as big of an annual question mark as the new-look offensive line was coming into 2022, and yet HHS has allowed no meaningful TDs on the season thus far. Still, the psychology of bad past results after the leaves turn could create a small mental hurdle for Bill Sucharski’s lineup (not as “small” as the Valle U. Warriors, thank goodness) at the first blush of fall air. Class 5’s Fort Zumwalt West Jaguars also provide a more intriguing opponent for Hillsboro in Week 3.
Crystal City 40, Louisiana 20
Apparently, games involving as-yet-unbeaten teams at the Sunken Place aren’t worthy of box scores, coaches’ interviews, or more than 5 seconds’ worth of mention on the Applebee’s Weekly Roundtable, but The Geek can do his best to provide the scrum’s only recap here.
That frosh squad’s numbers-boost is already paying off for the Hornets. Louisiana forced enough bobbles and banged-in enough TDs early in the contest that Crystal City High held just a 2-point lead at halftime. There’s almost no footage of LHS moving the ball on CCHS’s defense in mid-game, but The Geek is guessing that Louisiana’s patented 2-way edge monsters like Syler Feldewerth (that’s how it’s spelled on the roster – besides, Feldewerth’s HUDL clips mostly spell “pancake”) were a load for the Hornets’ still-young defense to get a handle on. But the visitors’ Flexbone offense took over the proceedings in the 2nd half, as it is wont to do when a talented batch of kids embraces the Paul Johnson playbook as gospel. JCL’s Facebook thread provided the battle’s only 2nd-half updates while online scoreboards sat static, helping to promote someone’s nice vid of Crystal City’s coup-de-grace TD.
Week 3’s Crystal City opponent Bayless surged in the 2nd half against a respectable rival for the 2nd time in 4 games last weekend, nearly stunning the Grandview Eagles with a breathless comeback. That won’t make the Bronchos a Friday night favorite over 2-0 CCHS, though, and with Week 4 opponent Three Rivers Confluence remaining so under-funded and under-populated that the program didn’t even get to play a game next to any river in Week 2, there’s a damn good chance that the Hornets will be unbeaten at 4-0 when Gateway Tech hosts Crystal City on September 24th.
CCHS boosters need not worry about The Geek “hexing” the ’22 Hornets with talk of an unbeaten W/L record, since in Crystal City’s present circumstances, the idea of an “unbeaten” win-loss record is kind of meaningless and confined to parts of the campaign. What’s important is getting the junior-laden squad as much postseason experience (and as many extra practice-weeks) as possible in November, and boy, could the 2022 Class 1 playoffs turn out to be an “experience” with Crystal City, St. Pius, and Grandview booked into the same bracket. More on that in this week’s Power Poll.
Jefferson 35, Cuba 8
TGG may “rank” Friday night scores & analysis headlines above each other by measuring drama, tightness, and surprise, making JHS-over-Cuba into a poor candidate for top-of-scroll this week. But we can rest assured that Jefferson’s 35 points and 1-1 record are a very big deal indeed to Blue Jay Nation…following Week 1’s bizarre upset loss.
Herculaneum 22, Fredericktown 14
Mississippi Magazine won’t hear of it if any friendly fan-mail praises the “accuracy” of Week 2’s Blackcat-ball score prediction. A blind person could see that Herky’s improved team speed would bother Fredericktown’s meat-and-potatoes defense, but TGG thought that would occur at the start and not the climax of what became a heart-stopping scrum. Instead, it took Herculaneum nearly 4 quarters to get its footing and punch back after getting waylaid by the strongest (literally the strongest) Fredericktown lineup seen in ages.
Lucas Bahr is a hero once again, but it was Herky’s ability to lose the LOS to a big unit in the 1st half and rebound to win it convincingly (on hostile turf!) in the late-going that impresses The Geek most.
Grandview 32, Bayless 30
Grandview coughed-up a bad, overconfident latter half on defense against a 2nd heavy underdog in 2 games (counting the Chaffee episode from ’21 and not courageous Paris as a recent “cupcake”), allowing Bayless to rally toward what could have been the Bronchos’ biggest win to date. It puts new GHS skipper Jason Kimminau in the same boat as Dan Oliver of St. Pius X following the Lancers’ “shlock at 8 o’ clock” performance vs Bayless in Week 8 of last season.
As TGG recalls, St. Pius blamed a muddy field and moved on. Grandview probably can’t afford to be so flippant, given a challenging Week 3 bout at Hill Valley in which the Birds of Prey cannot give up 30-or-more points and expect to prevail with a victory.
Seckman 69, University City 6
As Kim Wexler puts it in Better Call Saul, “yup.”
St. Pius 47, Bishop DuBourg 0
As Vanilla Ice once put it, “yup yup.”
Windsor 28, Perryville 7
(A transcript of Regional Radio’s postgame Perryville Pirates segment, with The Geek’s reaction at the time of broadcast)
Regional Radio End-Zone Show Host Nathan Gertz: “Well, coach, it’s great to see that Perryville posted a 28-7 win over Windsor this evening. Looks like a really nice game for your offense…”
TGG: “Wait. That can’t be the final score. Windsor was leading 14-7 at halftime, and now the scoreboard says “Windsor 28, Perryville 7.” Even if that final score is wrong, Windsor couldn’t have scored negative 7 points! Stop! Double-check! Don’t do it man!”
Gertz: “So, I’ll keep my question brief. As you were beating Windsor 28-7 earlier tonight, you know, the night on which Perryville beat Windsor 28-7, are there any players you want to credit for Perryville’s 28-7 win over Windsor? Because, whenever a team wins 28-7, people want to know how exactly it was they won 28-7, and…”
TGG: “No No No No No No No No No No….”
Gertz: “…and in summing it all up, coach, who in Perryville’s 28-7 win was most responsible for Perryville’s 28-7 win?”
(long pause)
Perryville Coach: “we. did. not. win.”
Ugh.
Sullivan 38, DeSoto 0 (Thursday)
Sullivan is fielding its most-athletic roster since the early 2010s, making the Eagles a bad match-up for the DeSoto Dragons in 2022. North County hosts DHS next week, which is hardly a reprieve.
Lafayette 42, Fox 20
Mississippi Magazine also believes Fox High School is on a better track than its cross-town rival this year, in spite of the disappointing defeat to Lafayette, because…
Parkway South 32, Northwest 14
A word of advice for the 0-2 Northwest coaching staff – do NOT talk to boosters about how much “progress” the team is making and how much more “modern” the offense is now. The spread offense was invented by Curly Lambeau about 90 years ago, and “modern” offenses are the kind that score points any which way. Any “transfer portal disadvantage” that a Flexbone team like Fox supposedly has can be brushed-off with an effective new pilot at QB, while any such major injury or departure from Cedar Hill’s new offense would make a fragile pass-happy attack even harder to keep glued together.