Windsor Owls at Festus Tigers
No, no, no. Sorry, Mr. Jeff Jenkins. The Geek is not, nor will he ever turn Mississippi Magazine into an “Us vs World” publication for sake of Alma Mater, or any other Tri-City football brand. Festus doesn’t get “automatic” spots at the top of scrolls, especially when expecting a healthy W such as the Tigers do versus Windsor in Week 3.
This week’s theme is TV wrestling, and everyone knows a wrestling card begins with “squash” matches, in which favorites with nothing else to do come out and greet the crowd, then prevail in 2-3 minutes against nobodies. The “squashed” rassler can huff, puff, and blow the squared circle down, but they will lose to a performer who scarcely looks at them, like in The Geek’s favorite 2020s squash match:
You put the Cruiserweight and Middleweight bouts on first, and then you bring out George Foreman vs Evander Holyfield. We’ll get some easy (and lopsided) predictions out of the way quickly, to dive more in-depth on 2 wonderful I-55 Conference games, and HHS vs FZW.
As for the Black & Gold, the WHS game is a rare summer-time occasion where A.J. Ofodile wouldn’t be half-glad to see starters conditioning themselves by playing well into the 2nd half. Festus should get so many turns on offense that the boys could wedge downfield and score Electric Football-style by the 4th quarter if needed, but the coaches want to see clean execution and an opportunistic team following the follies of Week 2. Defensively, anything more than a single TD allowed to a rival offense as confoundingly flat as Windsor High’s would be a let-down. PREDICTION: TIGERS 44, ALBINO BIRDS 7
Northwest Lions at Seckman Jaguars
Northwest and other Suburban League schools might feel mighty ripped-off by a competitor having 5 straight home games to begin a season, as the Seckman Jaguars are in the midst of playing right now. It’s fortune that this Friday’s game is in Imperial, though, as Northwest-CH could have most of its ch-ch-chalkboard Xs and Os cancelled by a Seckman offense that absolutely hogs the game’s possession time, unlike the high-octane thrills of 2022’s lopsided meeting. Nick Baer’s genius in preparing the ’23 Jaguars was to realize that Cole Ruble wasn’t responsible for most of Seckman’s scoring drives in 2022…he just sped them up a bunch! Explosive rumbles for TDs are great to watch, but skippers like Baer think unstoppable TD drives of 7 minutes or longer are as pretty as a picture. It’s unlikely Cedar Hill can mount any comeback drives competing within the 15:00 or 20:00 TOP minutes its offense is probable to get. PREDICTION: JAGUARS 41, LIONS 0
Crystal City Hornets at Bayless Bronchos
Bayless doesn’t have much of a backfield to threaten Crystal City’s lightning-quick defense with in Week 3, but we should expect the visiting CCHS rushers to take just a few turns to get rolling.
After all, they’ll be gripping the football with 2 hands at a time. PREDICTION: HORNETS 32, BAYLESS 6
North County Raiders at DeSoto Dragons
DeSoto’s defense showed tiny signs of a pulse against a premier Class 4 team in Sullivan. That’s a badly timed development for the Bonne Terre Buccaneers, who are averaging less than 5 yards-per-play, and haven’t had a wide receiver snag 2+ catches yet. PREDICTION: NORTH COUNTY 24, DRAGONS 7
Lindbergh Flyers at Fox Warriors
Fox’s saving grace against the Suburban League’s upper tier is that a few of the schedule’s most skillful opponents can be blocked and tackled. Red & White was stubborn against the run against the Lafayette Lancers, beaten only through the aerial game via Lafayette’s curious mix of part-time passers.
That’s an excellent sign going into Week 3’s bout against Lindbergh, for which RB Victor Wheaton has been the top weapon, and which is assuredly NOT living up to the “Flyers” nickname in ’23, completing just 6 passes on 19 throws so far. PREDICTION: LINDBERGH 28, WARRIORS 21
Fort Zumwalt West Jaguars at Hillsboro Hawks
Now for some main event action…in the Heavyweight class!
Fort Zumwalt West couldn’t even properly blow-out the Maroons of Belleville West last Friday, which is a clue that Hillsboro could be poised to be locked-in at 3-0 while other scrums are still in doubt. However, it also puts the Varsity Hawks under a certain kind of pressure. Win this week’s game, and the HHS Hawks could carry a gazillion-game win streak over public schools into September’s emotional rivalry bout at Festus.
There are clearly a lot of parallels between Hillsboro and Seckman pigskin in 2023, one of those angles being that opponents are realizing in horror just what a time-of-possession weapon that the Hillsboro “replacement” backfield can be without rushing for as many explosive gallops to paydirt as in ’22. Week 3’s rival Jaguars feasted on a couple of Illinois’ QBs 6 days ago, and played solid Red Zone defense against Eureka, but its run defense is still a likely bummer. Presumably, the Jaguars could be possessing the football even less frequently than the Cape Girardeau Central Tigers in Week 2.
The scary thing about Friday’s guest is that FZW’s tailbacks did find some daylight against the powerful Wildcats a fortnight ago. But it’s a dose of tremendous speed, not so much size and strength, that the Hawks have lost on defense going from 2022 to ’23. The Jaguars can’t seem to figure out who’s supposed to play starting quarterback, a drastic disadvantage going-up against a District winner in Preston Brown. PREDICTION: HAWKS 34, FORT ZUMWALT WEST 24
St. Pius Lancers at Grandview Eagles
The week’s Jefferson County Leader published a bit about St. Pius’ own “Mighty Mouse” kids at the line-of-scrimmage, belying the visual effect of a big, bad, numerous Varsity Lancers roster in Coach Ray’s maiden campaign. The Geek has been racking his brain trying to think of a past local High School game that featured a really good Wishbone team against a bigger, stronger lineup such as Grandview presents to the visiting Lancers in ’23. It’s kind of hard, since the Chillicothe team that finally knocked-off the good old Herculaneum Blackcats in 1991 was TNT in an ant colony on the offensive and defensive lines, and Herky spent a lot of its time going up against (and usually defeating) faster, flashier teams along the way.
There was the Class 3 playoff game in 1995 that pitted Herky’s old-as-the-hills offense against Warrenton, one of the biggest, roughest teams that TGG ever saw on a Missouri field in the 90s. Much like Grandview’s roster this autumn, there weren’t a ton of likely game-breaking threats on Warrenton’s sideline. But the Dunklin visitors were so big and strong across all positions that it didn’t matter, as Herky’s tackles behind the line turned into 5-yard gains for hulking Warrenton fullbacks. They’d just barrel on forward through the hits, falling for as many or more yards as they churned for against 180-lb. linebackers. It took a punched-out fumble and several other miracles in a row for Herky to win, though prevail the fabled Blackcats did.
Grandview’s offense is a tad more intricate outside the hashes (SPX has to change playbooks just to put receivers outside the hashes) which gives St. Pius a chance to foil the Eagle offense with what could prove to be superior pursuit in the open field. What’s more frightening for SPX is what happens when the 10-yard and 15-yard Wishbone carries from the DuBourg game run into brick walls at Winchester Avenue. If St. Pius can’t make the inside running game produce, will Coach Ray turn to the Lancers’ old Shotgun-Spread system that the Lancers still knew how to run at the Jamboree?
It feels trite and obvious to predict a low-scoring game. But we’ve already seen how many points Grandview and St. Pius can put on scoreboards in 2023 – that’s hardly the issue this week. The angles in play include SPX’s bad matchup against a gigantic D-line, and GHS’s offense lacking confidence against Hill Valley’s athletes thanks to so many dreadful losses in a row in the head-to-head series.
If either offense solves its problem Thursday on the practice field, or Friday in the 1st quarter, then Grandview vs St. Pius X could turn lopsided once again. But if both defenses should prove to have pesky edges of their own, expect a single TD to mean EVERYTHING in Friday’s final frame. PREDICTION: EAGLES 13, LANCERS 10
Herculaneum Blackcats at Jefferson Blue Jays
If there are many comparisons between Hillsboro and Seckman’s plights in midseason, so there are similarities between Jefferson and St. Pius X’s roles as nominal I-55 Conference favorites in Week 3. (To show how tenuous those “favorite’s” roles are, The Geek already predicted one conference “upset” in the article above.)
Like the St. Pius Lancers, the Blue Jays are thrilled to get out of the blocks on a sprint after a summer of worried coaches’ looks and boosters’ doubts. The JHS offensive line debuted to rave reviews. However, like SPX, the Jefferson High kids have to deal with an unexpectedly strong rival this Friday, on a night that The Geek originally slated as an easy win over Herky’s green Grade 10.
Scratch that – with a Blackcat’s claw. That sophomore Herculaneum class has got as many big bruisers as Grandview’s upperclass this season, and senior Shea Eberhardt is a leftover mauler from 2022’s winning team who has found a “Refrigerator Perry” role as a nose guard and occasional goal-line menace on offense for the ‘Cats. Jefferson’s nascent line faces its biggest challenge this week, perhaps made worse by the pressure of Blue Jay Drive.
But the Blackcats can be attacked through the air, and Jefferson’s “power” offense could strangely be more equipped to score passing TDs against Herky than wheel-spinning Windsor from Week 1. QB Kole Williams has thrown for about 400 yards along with 5 TDs against only a lone INT so far. HHS, in the absence of Jackson Dearing, doesn’t have a passing game that can reply in kind.
Herculaneum’s best – maybe only – chance to beat Jefferson for the second year in a row will come if the contest is an ugly one, and Eberhardt bangs-in a couple of short touchdown runs while the hosts fail and flail with turnovers in the Red Zone. Yet if the game even comes close to being pretty to look at, we expect JHS will avenge 2022’s defeat…vs a much stingier phalanx of Felines than anyone expected in ’23. PREDICTION: BLUE JAYS 22, BLACKCATS 7