Mississippi Magazine is trying hard not to be negative about the events of this summer, in which the Football Gods decided to warn Jefferson County about getting too cocky with its newfound success. It’s hard not to guilt trip, though, because it was Hurricane Beryl’s aftermath (and northward turn) in July that, for a moment, made The Geek think everything might be okay. Beryl’s leftover spray created “Hoodie Weather” just after Independence Day, in which TGG and a certain Marionville Comets namesake observed as every tiny Missouri creek, brook, and stream turned muddy and violent like the Kansas River. We laughed as a “rolling” piece of furniture joined the chairs, tables, and coolers floating down the Joachim slough, a scene straight out of “O Brother, Where Art Thou?”
“What you ridin’ there, Tommy?”
“Roll top desk.”
The controversy of St. Pius’ exit from the JCAA had quieted down by July. If all of SPX’s rivals wanted to form a new league called the “QCC (Shopping Network)” trying to avoid any sight, sound, hide or hair of the Festus private school, well, they’ll have a heck of a decision to make when St. Pius is drawn into a MSHSAA playoff round against one or more of them. Most sports fans in the Tri-Cities have determined to stand down on the small-schools conference row and the St. Pius softball Jamboree boycott, etc, watching with the same sort of amusement TV wrestling viewers had when Jimmy Hart formed “The Alliance To Destroy Hulk Hogan.” You can’t erase a fact of life (like a rival living 5 miles down the road), and the District postseason would still bring crosstown students together regardless of what grown-ups do. Meanwhile, there’s nothing wrong with our strongholds at Hillsboro, SHS, FHS, JHS, and CCHS. 50-yard lines are ready to make all right with the world again.
That’s assuming that THERE ARE INTACT 50-YARD LINES, though. Even as Beryl’s storm turned into a calm sea of gentle rain over the Mississippi, it turned out to be the calm before its own Perfect Storm of campus floods, knocking out Fox High School and Seckman High School’s fields (most probably) until 2025. When the river – the great big one – didn’t back up and ruin the Bradley’s Farm field in Beryl’s aftermath, we thought for a moment that all 12 Mississippi Magazine campuses must have been spared, along with various main streets that go underwater when the Mississippi can’t run anymore. But the Meramec and the Rock Creek valley, in spite of their disparate sizes, each flooded in a direction that the river’s rising tributary mouths couldn’t deal with, and so our 2 biggest programs’ venues have taken on extensive water damage from the July deluge. Again, the Windsor Owls must wonder how they survived, even if the banks behind their bleachers did not.
Oh, brother. The silver linings have disappeared from a dark cloud hovering over our pigskin revival. Seckman and Fox are rightfully proud of their gridirons, with Jaguar head coach Nick Baer so often lovingly calling Seckman’s field “The Valley,” and Fox standing as Jeff County’s flagship outpost in view of the STL skyline. But we can’t publish 2 angry posts in a row. Got any spare silver, anyone?
How about this – this offseason’s crazy effect on 2024’s “local” football schedule is actually a good thing, at least compared to another extreme direction it could have gone in.
Suppose after the season of 2023, in which Seckman rang up a 10-0 start, Hillsboro went to the Show-Me Bowl, Crystal had its best November since the 1960s, and so on, our administrators decided (in Ivy League style) that we had the 12 bestest teams who were the bestest friends and the coolest-est people of all, and that we were going to seal-off our shop with a “Super Duper All-Jeff County Conference” schedule, with every school playing 9-out-of-10 contests right next door. The Gridiron Geek pretends to yearn for the days when it was really like that, hailing the Herculaneum-DeSoto pairing of 2024 as another “Jefferson College TeleVision Bowl” for old-school MSHSAA fans to enjoy, preferably while listening to Duran Duran or the Talking Heads. But it wouldn’t be a good fit for where the Dirty Dozen’s success has taken our football now. 2024’s teams deserve to play all around the region for everybody who will watch. Hell or high water, this summer’s changes abide that.
Seckman and Fox, in their own way, will join Festus, Hillsboro, St. Pius, Crystal City, and even DeSoto in “barnstorming” style events this fall. No, the Jaguars and Warriors aren’t going to Tennessee or matching up with Illinois teams; in fact they’re going to stay pretty close to home (geographically speaking) for a couple of homeless lineups. But because of Seckman’s perfect 2023 regular season, and because Fox thundered in the Class 6 playoffs as lately as 2020, we’re hoping that our pair of “homeless” teams turn into big, bad, scary war bands instead, causing their “extra” Friday hosts to treble anxiously instead of celebrating another bonus-night at the local ballfield with hot chocolate and fight songs. The Jags and Warriors can turn their plight into a psychological weapon with victories.
The Seckman Jaguars, for one, look reloaded instead of rebuilt for 2024’s season. Imperial coaches are glad that 8 out of 11 starters on last year’s defense have returned to a unit that was almost perfect prior to the Jackson game, with exception of flawed tactics in one half against Oakville. The Jaguars regretfully join the Festus Tigers in losing a ton of their sack-total from last campaign with May’s graduations, but Seckman defensive lineman “Layin’ Down The” Law Newman is back for a promising senior campaign after taking down opposing quarterbacks 5 times in 2023. Brady Ambrose is Baer’s big man in the backfield this season, but the Jaguars also plan to compensate for some turnover on the OL with more quick passes, and a fancier playbook for 2 sharp dual-threat QBs.
Fox coach Brent Tinker feels good about his lineup too. Option QBs can only thrive with fullbacks churning next to them, and Warrior senior Cameron Underwood will boast a prodigal rusher in the backfield with sophomore Jude Pribish. Pribish is a fast physical bloomer who’s already comparable to Justin Lehn and Mason Schirmer of the Tri-Cities in size and ability. Fox’s senior class numbers for 2024 have thinned out slightly from the astonishing (and flawed) lists of kids found on STLToday, HUDL, and MaxPreps, but the Arnold “barnstormers” still carry a senior corps of well over 20 athletes.
Gosh dang it, though, the Suburban League’s schedules are still all-consuming without always looking fair. The Geek learned from Russell Korando’s 2024 reporting that the Suburban League has indeed been utilizing its color-code to separate teams into different “Pots” for scheduling pairings and standings, which is why there continue to be so many reigning Suburban champs alongside SHS. But the league’s top brass knows that it can’t “reward” teams for success by putting them in tougher Pots. So, the schools appear to be organized by size and geography instead, and Fox and Seckman cannot escape the cookware that they’re in. That’s too bad, since Seckman could use a few tougher games each regular season, and Fox High School can use a few more winnable games on each slate.
The Fox Warriors and Seckman Jaguars schedules for 2024 are also so very, very familiar and unchanged from recent years that there’s no point in TGG recapping them on the blog now. Apart from – of course – the fact they’ll be on the road so very much. Hooray that Fox and Seckman play in the Suburban League of Greater St. Louis, not the Horse Rancher’s League of Greater Wyoming.
Don’t Forget Northwest, It’s Got a Dry Stadium and Everything
We can’t forget the Northwest Lions of Cedar Hill, the Suburban League team that made The Geek weep tears late last season.
Week 9 of 2023 snapped the epic, painful losing streak at NHS-CH. Northwest head coach Scott Gerling’s training camp interviews from summer of ’24 were still so humble in tone, we worried that Northwest’s coaches might have looked at their next schedule and thought of the old joke: “If you want to keep your job, and you can’t win, you’d better become a Character Builder.”
Lo and behold, the 2024 Northwest Lions have drawn a favorable hand from a Suburban League that so often deals-out Deuces and Jokers. Week 1 opponent Sullivan may have been way out of Cedar Hill’s league (excuse the pun) last season, but there were about as many upperclassmen on that team as Fox currently has training for this Friday, and we’ll see how the Varsity Eagles do this time around. In any case, Sullivan’s reliance on a few skill players at a time – as a low-end Class 4 enrollment program – could be to its detriment against Class 6 on a very hot opening week of football.
Week 2 will take Northwest to visit the Mehlville Panthers, a squad that Gerling’s team will have beaten as of 3 games prior. Then there’s a chance for revenge against Webster Groves, and another winnable contest against Parkway South in midseason. Could the previously 12th-out-of-12 ranked Varsity Lions make their way to 3-2 before hosting Fox in Week 6’s historic bout? It’s possible.
They’ll need some horses, of course, but Northwest has Wes Knuckles crackin’ at WR again as a senior this fall, and a potentially nice set of upperclassmen on the offensive line. There’s a dilemma over the QB spot with no heir-apparent to a graduated Nick Youngins, but we think the Lions should keep the ball on the ground, focus on their defense, and try to squeak-out those 3 early wins anyway.
Of all local teams, Northwest can afford to pull a “Windsor 2023” in September and October, and just try to defeat smaller opponents in a “safety” fashion (literally or metaphorically) by any score. Cedar Hill’s junior and senior Cheerleaders won’t care if there aren’t many long TDs to squeal at, and parents won’t care if the first victory of a new season comes by the score of 8-7. Just winning a few games would be “novelty” enough for the Lions, our only big program with a stadium to play football in. Start putting Ws on the board, and watch everyone’s mood (and attendance) go up no matter how many long bombs are (or aren’t) attempted by either QB. With any luck, Northwest can turn its “surprise” 3-game homestand of October into a celebration of 3x Northwest High’s win total of 2022 and 2023 combined.
Don’t call it a prediction. But it may not be fiction.